Do you think people who say “Looks don’t really matter in dating” are lying hypocrites?

I know so many people who say that (especially women). I, however, think it is a major lie. In fact, sociological studies have found that people of both sexes value physical appearance more than any other quality in speed dating trials. I also watched a show on 20/20 where good-looking people were given better treatment almost all the time compared to ugly or average people (and don’t tell me beauty is in the eye of the beholder, because it has been proven that there is an ideal face structure that crosses racial and cultural boundaries).

I think that looks definitely do matter! But, for me, not necessarily the classic good looks. What matters to me is if I really like looking at a guy. He could be absolutely gorgeous, but if I am disappointed in our connection, then looking at him is just a superficial, and short-lived, enjoyment. He could be not all that handsome in the classic sense, but if I feel a good connection, then I will truly enjoy looking at him. And I will notice things that I find truly beautiful.
I do understand, however, that you are talking more about first impressions. Maybe it is true that classic looks..facial structure, symmetry, etc…can hold more weight there. So, yes, they do get people “in the door” so to speak, but that’s not what will get them into the heart. It’s most important to cultivate the beauty inside.

Cassiopeia Project – Relativity Chapter 6